Archive for September, 2005

GOOD LAUGH

September 29, 2005


yafta….(you have to)…(left over from my kids when they were little..along with crash can..and yabut, which every parent knows stands for yeah, but..as in yeah, but jimmy’s mother lets him…back to the beginnig..
yafta..read the post danny made on my adios amigos…post…he writes a little ditty and it is so funny..its about waco and sex…

WEEKLY WEST NEWS

September 29, 2005


i didnt post weekly west news last week as nothing happened…nope..too fucking hot for anyone to do anything..
but this week..we have 4 deaths, one birth and 6 birthdays ranging from 1-80 years old..
khzt is sponsoring a bake sale to raise money for the hurricane victims..
red cross is holding a blood drive
west ambulance is having a fund raiser for themselves(hmmm)
the city of Ross is having its 20th year volunteer fire dept bbq..plus a dance with music provided by the heart of texas road gang..now here is some really great news..the wisd received a superior rating…it is the highest rating a school can get..and we got it…pretty good for a bunch of bohunks..
i finally got enough nerve to ask henrietta what a polka mass was as i had a mental picture of the intire mass done with a polka beat..well i was close..all the music(hymns) that is sung is sung to a polka beat..and usually sung in czech..ill let you guys picture that one in your head without any adlibs from me..
50 years ago this week..henrietta and george got married…i saw the picture of them at the wedding and she was really pretty…george looks the same..just more wrinkles..
my good friend michael adamson who is president of the waco electicians local son won the weekly contest that the paper has to guess the winners of the picked teams and he got 10 out of 12 right and won a $20 coupon for the pizza house of west…way to go tanner…
there is a 2/1 house for sale on virginia street for $35,000..man anyone who wants to invest in real estate should come to west..do we have some houses for you…jeanettet karlick who writes the little column in the paper called thanks for listening(shouldnt that be thanks for reading????)..anyhow she is still writing about her trip to czech, australia and poland..said in one of the towns in czechlavacia(SP) that they have a texas museum which is full of historical information about the czech’s that left there and went to texas…pretty cool..
both grocery stores are having sales and dr.pepper and blue bell ice cream are on sale…fuckers…
and this little bit is for all you believers out there..
PRAYER TO SAINT JUDE
Most holy apostle, St. Jude, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, the church honors and nvokes you universally, as the patron of hopeless cases, of things almost despaired of.Pray for me. I am so helpless and alone. Make use. I implore you, of that particular privilege given to you, to bring visible and speedy help where help is almost despared of.Come to my assistance in this great need taht i may receive the consolation and help of heaven in all my necessities, tribulations and sufferins, particularly(here you make your request) and that i may praise God with you and all the elect forever.I promise, O blessed St. Jude, to be ever mindful of this great favor, to always honor you as my special and powerful patron, and to gratefully encourage devotion to you. amen..

well..hm…i would think you would be pretty desperate to have to say that to anyone especially a dead person..which is why i love the goddess..she says she gets more prayers from behind the wheel of speeding cars and is usally “Oh goddess…….”…followed by screaching brakes..
she prefers all prayers to go something like this..
“oh goddess, i have fucked up again…can you help?”
she says she does the best she can..

HAIL TO THE CHEIF..PRESIDENT OBAMA

September 29, 2005


man, that cracks me up…sorry..just another way to get my giggles..rain..rain…yes, virginia..there is something called rain…we got rain..nana nana boo boo, stick your head in doo doo..we got rain…
sorry …i get carried away…but man..rain..so wonderful..and it is cool out..not 103…not 108 but 80…whooptfuckingdo..
sorry..
im still mad at the dallas morning news..they said that i would see some changes big fucking deal..they swaped the cross word puzzles out..top for bottom..but the comics are still the size of postabe stamps..garfield looks like a smudge with ears..fuckers
so going to send another death threatning email to them..the guy i usually email my bitches to is off till the first of oct..so another guy that i dont know got my email..but mike must have warned him about me as he didnt seem overly concerned that i refered to them as dickheads…going to send a really good one full of my favorite words and then at the end say..angry email to follow…
fuckers
my girlfriend in austin who is from new jersey to begin with has decided that paris hilton is starting to look like a likely candidate for president..as bush has gotten as stupid as he can get…and needs a replacement..
when i saw brown not taking the blame for fema’s fuck up’s and blaming everyone else ..all i could think of was… i bet he can cross his legs like a radio center rockette as he has no balls at all…
i on the other hand…cant cross my legs..huh huh

ADIOS AMIGOS

September 28, 2005


well, the mexican army is going back to mexico after 3 weeks of helping us in san antonio…really do appreaciate all the help that people have given to texas to help in aiding all these people…but do think i heard davey crockett spinning in his grave…
and for some reason and the goddess knows i have no reason to..but i feel like i have to take up for and defend waco..when chris said it was the most boring city i was right there going yup…it sure is a boring city..and then for some reason i felt the need to defend the city…dont ask me why…but here goes..
waco has a very nice art center, the hippodrome theatre, the waco civic center, the waco symphony, there is a historic villiage that you can visit and indian sprins park is beautiful nd the mason’s grand lodge is an incrediable building with the two grand lions in front to guard the door..we have several museums..some absolutely beautiful old historic homes and baylor for all its faults has a pretty campus.anually they have a charity ball, cotton fest, christmas on the brazor which is really pretty. the brazos river festival and on the 4th of july we have a great fireworks show over the brazos..the suspension bridge was made and designed by the same guy that built and designed the brooklyn bridge…plus you can watch games at floyd stadium and the ferrell center..where the baylor girl bears won the championship…we also have lots of outdoor concerts during the summer and lots of activities for the kids to intertain them so the parents can listen to great music.
so there…

IM A SICK PUPPY

September 28, 2005

i have waited for a while to post this as it is so mean and so sick..but held off as long as i could and hope people that got flooded will forgive me..but when the flood in la. first started and i saw all that water two things popped into my mind and then i pushed them away….first one was i could hear bill cosby doing is old act from the 60’s…when he is noah and building the ark and he doesnt believe god is going to send all the rain and god says “how long can you tread water noah?” and the other one was i could hear johnny cash singing “how high’s the water father?”
“6 feet high and rising”…
ok, im sorry i know its sick..but i have told you this before..im a twisted and sick person…at least you were warned..

going back to the house yesterday i had my radio blaring on my oldies but goodies station.and they played linda rondstat singing blue bayou….perfect song for the people of new orleans…

SORRY ABOUT THAT CHIEF…
so sad..don adams died at 82 from lung infection…i loved maxwell smart…”would you believe i liked him?”

in the spring of 1970 my dad bought me a set of sheets from j.c. penny…they had big ugly blue and black flowers on a white back ground…well, i still have one pillow case and the top sheet from that set…would still have the rest of the set but the dogs ate them…i cant believe that it has lasted this long…

catching bits and peices of the bob dylan special on pbs…but made me think of his son jacob and his band wildflowers…he sings better than daddy and is way more handsomer..( a word???)

jon stewart of comedy central had the best line about the flood and the response..
“when people say they dont want to play the blame game it’s usually because they are to blame”.
doh, no shit..
watched barak obama on pbs last night…really do like him and what he has to say..wish he would run for president…plus i just like saying his name…barak obama…..

people with dogs there is a new strain of doggie flu and it is like kennel cough but much worse…so keep an eye out on your dogs…

DALLAS AM NEWS REPLIES TO MY NASTY EMAIL

September 28, 2005


checked my emails when i got here and had a short email from the dallas am news after i sent them a email letting them know how pissed i was at what they did with the paper..
it said…
WOW… yes we have gotten a lot of complaints and are making some changes and will be in the thursday paper..let us know what you think(we all know that’s going to happen)..

ha, least they had a good sense of humor about it..think i called them dick heads…just as long as i get my cross word puzzles back and the paper printed in large enough print to be able to read..the comics are so small now i cant read them…and i have to have my garfield and doonsbury…

man oh man it is hot here..got up early and finished up my shopping and the humidity is horrible…supposed to get over 100 again. 103 yesterday…im waiting for our cold front to bring the temp into the 80’s..nights are supposed to be cool…cant wait..
mojo called me last night after she got off work..she talks to me the whole time she is riding the bus, walking home…can hear all the street noises…pretty cool..anyhow..she is all excited…her boyfriend rolff’s step mom is a para-legal and her assistant left and she offered mojo the job..its 2 days a week..at $22 an hour..she is so excited..she goes in today and fills out all the paper work..she is afraid she wont get the job..but dont know how she can miss..the woman came looking for her cause she said she knew mojo would do the job well..she is going to drop two of her classes in school as if she keeps up the schedual she willhave only 2 days off a month..that is too much stress on her..that kind of work, meeting, school to meet each week is what drives people back to drinking..but i sure do hope she gets it..she was all excited.plus her brother had called and told her again how much fun they had and how great she looked and how happy she was and how proud he was of her…made her feel so good..she has sure come along way…and the cowboys won…

HEADING OUT

September 27, 2005


ok, my ass is sore and my back hurts so must mean its time to haul ass…going to go to the store and stock up on more fucking tuna fish..just how many ways are there to fix tuna? need to get more yogurt..want to buy a yogurt machine but cant find one in here or in waco..rats…
what really makes it hard to diet in this town is it is full of bakeries…and the whole town smells like one big fucking kolache..cream cheese kolahe…and one of the bakeries makes this bowling ball shapped thing..like a donut but no hole..huge sucker and filled with blueberry, cherry, bavarian cream, or other great stuff..then rolled in sugar..they are about the size of a soft ball and cost $1. and a heart attack…oh man..get thee behind my fat thights satan…

OLD FART’S DESEASE

September 27, 2005


yes, i have it..think the little mini stroke did me a good one..someone posted or left me an email or something about doing a blog on hurricane jackie scared hurricane rita off..cant remember who did it and cant find it on blogs..if i didnt know i was sitting on my ass i wouldnt be able to find it..fuck…so whom ever …would you tell me again who are where it is…doh…
missed bobby dylan the other night. every since hurricane rita skipped across texas i have gotten lousy pbs reception..but great article in paper about it..and list the top ten dylan songs..here tis
1.blowing in the wind
2.only a pawn in their game
3.with god on our side
4.girl from the north country
5.mr. tambourine man
6.love minus zero/no limit
7.maggies farm
8.ballad of a thin man
9.like a rolling stone..
10.like a rolling stone..
ok. just figured the article out..this is a list of the to 10 songs of the program..fuckers..
hope pbs comes back in..i watch it all the time and really do enjoy it..love watching mr. noodle and mr. rogers..

MO’SHIT

September 27, 2005


doonsbury cartoon yesterday was soooo right on…here tis.
duke and honey are in iraq..looking out over the balcony…
Honey:over there sir, see that cloud of dust?it’s some sort of military convoy…
Duke: that’s not military, honey..that’s the halliburton gang, pulling up stake!
Duke: i dont get it. why the hell would cheney’s boys be leaving the….the…
Honey:…new orleans
Duke: go pack honey…

john edwards is starting to make presidential speaches and dragging ole left foot forest thru the mud…
mr. edwards chidded bush for suspending the 1931 Davis-Bacon act, which sets wages for workers on federal contracts..
“When the only shot many people have is a good job rebuiding New Orleans, the president intervened to suspend prevailing wage laws so his contactor friends can cut wages for a hard day’s work.” Mr. Edward’s said.
well, fucking doh….no shit…

i see where cindy sheenan got arrested…dont know which grin was bigger..her’s or the cops..big fucking deal…i know the war is wrong and so do 99%of the world..but we can’t just pull up stakes and go home..but we can ease into it..but i agree in with her right to protest..but think she is doing it for the wrong reason..and think its a little self served…her son’s still dead, but now she’s a star…hmmmm.

did anyone see the tv where they talked about this 60 pound st. bernard puppy that swollowed a 13 inch serrated butcher knife???? holy shit..had to operate and take it out…rocky may be a pain in the ass sometimes but at least he doesnt eat knifes..although it he thought it would make me nuts he would..

i still want to know what happened to monty rock the third..

yesterday it was 108…yup..1….0…..8…degrees…fuck me…we are supposed to be getting a cold front which will bring the temperature down to the 80’s…now that is scarry..im waiting for fall…then summer starts up again…fall is 3 days..

i think my little stroke has fucked with my memory..i have lived here for 11 years..the west water is paid on the 15th of the month..always..i forgot to pay it…they waited and waited and then turned my water off today.got up went to brush my teeth ..no water…thought well, fuck…called caroline and she said they cut it off because i didnt pay it…and i was like…huh…??????????/ so had to go down pay the bill and $25 to get reconnected..so to say im not a happy camper is an understatement..fuckers..

did anyone watch 2 12 men last night..i laughed so hard i peed myself..but then i do that when i sneeze or cough..
anyhow..the kid had drawn a picture of a class mate with huge tits..and she had them but that’s not the point..so allen has to go to school to keep his kid from getting expelled and lets charlie play receptionist for the afternoon and he turns it into a hand job massage parlor…in the mean time allen meets the girls mother and she has hockers out to allens chin…he cant take his eyes off of them..he tries to make excuses but cant take his eyes off her tits..she keeps saying up here..bud..the eyes up..here..he says he cant help it he was a bottle baby..this goes on forever him babbling and her pissed at one point she says “what is the matter with you”..poor guy.i am not doing it justice but let me tell you.it was one of the funniest nights i have had in forever…shudda seen it

DALLAS MORNING NEWS CAN KISS MY ASS

September 27, 2005


oh, man…am i pissed…the past week they have been waring us that there were going to be some changes made in the style of the paper..well, they have screwed the pooch with me..they have turned my second favorite part of the paper into a magazine section..i get my paper and i seperate it to read..all the ads section goes on the floor to my left..then i take the front page, then the business section(boring so want it out of the way fast), metro, sports and then the living section which after sports is my favorite part as it has the comics and the cross word puzzles, which i do after i have read the entire paper…i like the way they have it as it is in a small section so that i can put it on a book and read the questions and do the answers without alot of moving around of the puzzle..do you get this?…anyhow..now they have turned that whole section into a magazine style which means the puzzle now runs straight down..the puzzle is on top and the questions are down below..so now i have to move the fucking puzzle up and down..read question..move it to put the answer in…move puzzle to read question.move it back to put in answer..fuck me..more work that my second marriage…so im going to write such a nasty fuckyoukissmyass letter that their heads will swivel on their little pencil geek necks..may have to double up on my meds…fuckers…babs blogged about changes..well, i feel the same way she does about changes..dont fuckn like em…hate em…loathe them…makes my ass red..if i want a change in my life ill dial the goddess and ask directly…keep that in mind neil and bob..who ever bought blogster…
i wish i could say i feel better after that little explosion but i dont..cause in my heart of heart i know those pea brained motherfuckers will not change it back.unless there are more nutcases like me out there..and goddess forbid if there is..cause if there are more out there like me….hey….more like me..we could take over the paper..then dallas, then texas and then the world…snap..ok, back to the real world.fuckers..