This made me laugh sooo hard…
BUSH’S HOLIDAY READING:AMERICAN WARRIORS
ONE MIGHT BE A CHRISTMAS GIFT, BUT PRESIDENT BUSH HAS A COUPLE OF BOOKS ON HIS NIGHTSTAND FOR HIS STAY IN CRAWFORD.(BESIDES A BOOK, FIRST LADY LAURA BUSH GAVE THE PRESIDENT CLOTHES AND BIKING GEAR. HE GAVE HER JEWELRY AND A DVD PLAYER.) (HIS CHRISTMAS GIFT TO US…ANOTHER YEAR OF BEND OVER BENDEHO, YOU’RE GETTING FUCKED AGAIN)
WHEN TRUMPETS CALL: THEODORE ROOSEVELT AFTER THE WHITE HOUSE:BY SARAH WATTS.299 PAGES…RECOMMENDED BY BRIAN WILLIAMS TO BUSH.
IMPERIAL GRUTS: THE AMERICAN MILITARY ON THE GROUND: BY ROBERT D. KAPLAN.448 PAGES.
excuse me while I laugh my ass off….he’s still reading that kids book on the goat from 9/11…..
fuck me till my life story is on the best seller list and Bush reads it..
Texas is on fire….5th driest year…nearly a dozen homes lost in tarrant county.the lowest was 1921 with only 17.91 inches of rain..1910 with 17.97 inches…1899 with 18.11 inches of rain…1956 with 18.55 inches and 2005 with 18.97 inches ..tha is if it doesn’t rain by sat..and no one is planning on it.18.97 inches of rainfall is more than 15 inches short of normal…less than half of the 47.57 inches recorded in 2004..the 4th wettest since since the weather service began keeping records..pretty fucking scary. here in west we are 11 inches below normal…but what rain we did get was at the right time so the farmers weren’t hurt…we had our first grass fire this morning but our spiffy little volunteer fire dept…got to it and had it out before any damage was done..we have an excellent volunteer dept…
two new cups of tazo tea…”zen”…..”high in the Kunlun mountains of china, monks spend days chanting and meditation in hopes of reachin complete enlightment. periodically they stop for a cup of tea quite like this.”….(while sipping thier zen tea, they patiently await the delivery of this month’s “big tits” and”wild ladies of the orient”)
“awake”…”imagine finding yourself on a lush tea estate in India around the turn of the century. Your breakfast tea would hav tasted a good deal like awake.”…
(until that bald headed skinny fucking Ghandi came along and fucked it all up for the British)
I was reading in the paper about a encyclopedia type website ran on donations…called wikipedia….it is a web site I guess where you can go on and add to, correct, amend, ???? thought it might be interesting to go visit…might want to check it out for a few clicks and giggles…
this is the good news bads news portion of my post…the good news is my neighbors 2 sons are visiting him from Phoenix, Arixona…matt and cody..2 cute little tow headed boys…yesterday the dad..david was sick with sinus infection, felt bad and laid down..so boys were bored and discovered my house..so i took them to grocery store and bought them sodas..and took them to park…they found their way home ……it was fun and i enjoyed them…that’s the good news…the bad news is im an insomniac and stay up till 4-5 am…sleep tillllllllllllll i get the fuck up….so this morning at exactly 10:45am…there is knocking on the door….i lay there waiting for them to go away…..they knock louder…i hear one say to the other…she must be asleep…the other says…:”knock louder”……they do…i dont move for fear i will get up jerk them in the house, and no one will ever find their bodies… they open the fucking door and say…”are you awake?”… i say…”i am now”,,in my …update your will, cause im going to kill you voice…which they arent familar with as he says…”we knocked but you didnt answer the door..”…i said, with my kiss your mommie and daddy goodby cause you are never going to see them again voice…”i stay up late and i sleep late…and I dont need you knocking on the door to wake me …AS I ALREADY HAVE A FUCKING ALARM CLOCK”.
door closes……..voices fade away…….silence….jackiesue goes back to sleep….
some times i really do like being me….
fuck me till i doze
IN THE NEWS….
This made me laugh sooo hard…