The sound you are hearing is me …I started the 3 glasses of water per meal and water in between meals diet..I actually think it might be working. I get full faster and eat less. I also have a path cut through the carpet from chair to bathroom, and make that funny sloshing sound when I walk.The best part is I now have the cleanest kidney’s in West.be back..have to pee..
ahhhhhh, feel so much better..
I said that I would do laundry today, but I lied..but Babs already knew that.I just checked out my tshirt drawer and unless I decide that wearing my night/shirt tshirts is a bad thing, I have enough tshirts to last 2 more weeks. Have plenty of sheets but running low on towels..so may just do a load of towels…or………just not bathe for 2 weeks..hey,if the French can do it..why not moi?..
I still haven’t got the lawn mower to start after the first time..so lawn still looks like crap. My plants are doing well, but other that one lone scrawny little jalopena (which was hotter than a motherfucker) I have no veggies …rats..but damn the plants look good..just barren..
Ok, enough stalling..apos gave me the letter P and have to use 6 words beginning with P that say something about me…you all know what the first P word is don’t you….with out giving it much thought…here goes

Pussy- but you knew that didn’t you..yes, P is for Pussy..and yes I do have one..it is just out of commission for any trenching..the cobwebs would prevent any action in the nether regions of my loins…only action down there is ridding itself of all the water I have been drinking..it’s only fuction is for outies, not innies..
P is for Parent…which I suck at.
P is for perservere…which I have and will continue to do, just to piss off the republicans.
P is for prayers…which I believe in and do alot of…for my friends, for friends of my friends..for family and family of friends..mostly I say this one prayer over and over and over again..Please Goddess, smite him…bip him…take him out..actually it’s more like a mantra…smite him..bip him…take him out…smite him..bip him…take him out…go team…
P is for piss, which I am full of with a dash of vinegar on the side.
P is for puzzles..I love puzzles..I do 3 crossword puzzles a day, in pen…I have an old crossword puzzle dictionary that I have had for 30 years..I keep adding new words to it that the dictionary doesnt have..I think I would like to make my own crossword puzzle dictionary someday..I also believe it is perfectly OK to cheat if need be..
jeez I hope that is 6 cause I am done for..can’t think of another P word that would work for me..oh yeah….One more…
P is for prick…as in my 3 exhusbands..and neil and bob from crapster…
I would like to leave you with this one bit of wisdom….the higher up the circus monkey climbed the pole…the more ass he showed..
ya’ll have a nice weekend…and come back and see us…ya’hea?


13 Responses to “…….SLOSH…..SLOSH………SLOSH SLOSH..SLOSH”

  1. Babs Says:

    hehehe, I knew you wouldn’t do laundry!!! I could see it in my crystal ball. Besides, who wants to do laundry while sloshing around everywhere? Towels don’t get dirty because you are clean when you use them. So no need to wash them. Yep.
    The Goddess doesn’t want you to mow or should would allow the mower to start.
    You did good with your p’s.

  2. michele Says:

    I liked your p is for prayer

  3. PJ Says:

    I think I suck at being a parent too, so you are not alone.

    Hey say one of those prayers for my ex ok?

    I like puzzles too. Crossword are my favorite. I didn’t say I was good at it did I?

    I know some pricks, but they aren’t from Texas so they couldn’t be the same ones. Geez. Am I to believe there are pricks all over the place?

    Happy Memorial Day Weekend.

  4. Junebugg Says:

    I keep trying to do the water thing but I’m addicte to diet dew~water doesn’t have any caffine or fizz or flavor. I know I need to damn it!

    I like the Ps! Aren’t all ex-husbands pricks, thus the reason for the EX!

  5. apositivepessimist Says:

    ahaahaa i have started drinking water as well…all that rehydrating the brain etc.

  6. Jezebelle Says:

    I do the water thing too, but not regularly. Cause I get tired of pissing. I swear the days I do it all I fucking do is pull down my damn pants. Its probably the damn toliet paper companies that started the whole 8 glasses thing. They must be making a killing.

  7. Eurotrash Says:

    In the case of house fire, one could do worse than being around Granny.

  8. leo myshkin Says:

    this ayurveda stuff i’m reading right now says not to drink with meals. they have lots of rules after you figure out your dosha. they suggest keeping a thermos full of hot water and drinking little bits of water frequently.

    i wonder how long this phase will last. in the old days, a case of beer would usually distract me.

  9. texlahoma Says:

    I’m a good circus monkey, I just stay near the bottom of the pole.

  10. Nancy Says:

    Be very, very careful with how much water you drink. You can actually drown your organs with too much water. They become water logged. Doc at work says no more then 6 8oz glasses for ladies our age.

  11. Nit Wit Says:

    I resent June bugs comment. I’m an ex husband who bent over backwards to make things easy for her. We had no kids but she lived with her boyfriend for the 20 months I was in Korea, and I kept a legal separation going for 18 months when I didn’t have to. Not really mad as I know most men can be shits from my experience with my stepdaughters and their love of the day.
    You are not a bad parent!!!!
    You should stop feeling guilty about past things. Just saying that proves that you care about your kids.
    We all learn as we go in this life and sometimes we wish we had learned something sooner, but we can only be what we are and do our best.
    Love the jokes and info so keep them coming between bathroom breaks. 🙂

  12. Nit Wit Says:

    I feel left out. I don’t have a letter or even a number.

  13. Scottish Toodler Says:

    I believe you should drink half your body weight in water everyday (not less than 64 oz/s though). I loved the P’s!!! Give P’s a chance!!! Hehehe… I don’t expect to have any veggies for along while. I envy your pepper (none of my peper seeds really did anything…. bummer…)

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