First off, I want to thank all of you for your kind, sweet words of comfort and encouragement…You have no idea how much it means to me.I don’t think I ever gave too much thought about what I was going through or what I had been through..I’m like a Niki commercial…I just did it…Don’t think I am all that special either..many women have been through worse.(The man who killed my mother got 8 years in prison) But I hate to tell you all,you ain’t seen nothing yet.
Jack had many many problems, without going into his home life or events that happened to him before he met me, he was a very troubled man. He needed fixing and I guess that is what drew me to him. He was 6′ and weighted about 230 or so…Loved his daughter as much as he knew how..He had many addictions, mainly alcohol but when he couldn’t drink he took any and all medications he could..I’m talking hand fulls of black beauties, and an equal amount of tuinals.On that July evening in Farminton, New Mexico he had enough of both to have killed any 2 normal sized men…He was out of control and had been experiencing petite mal seizures.He was for all practical senses..insane..He was going to kill me and my 17 month old daughter and to protect her life and mine, plus my sons, when he attepted to kill us I shot and killed him. I was first charged with murder but adventually after a grand jury it was dropped to voluntary manslaughter.On more than one occasion they were going to drop the charges completely to self defense, but Jack’s mother wouldn’t let it go and called everyone that held office in the state of New Mexico, so they told my attorney that I would surely be found not guilty but because of my mother-in-law, I would have to stand trial…The DA was furious…said it was a waste of money and time.
In Dec. of 1974 I was found not quilty..During the time from July to Dec. I had met a wonderful man, Chuck D. he has been my lover and always my friend..it’s been 33 years and he is still one of my best friends… He lives in Hawaii.and I can tell you he helped me in more ways than I can tell you..I moved to Calif. to be near him and it was the start of the rest of my new life…(the pictures above are the 4 of us taken at my Daddy’s about a week or so before the shooting, the other one is me the day before the trial..I know they said I would be found not guilty..but I don’t think I really believed them…By the way, it took the jury a little over an hour to come in with the verdict..they said they would have been in earlier but they wanted that last free meal on the state of New Mexico..When one of the jurist told my Daddy that, he said hell, I would have bought you all dinner if I had known.I know that I would never have made it with out my Daddy.I wonder what he would think of my blog and posting about this…oh well…
But I wasn’t the only one having a bad year….Richard M. Nixon got fired from being president..so something good did come out of my less than stellar year.
Hearst had a bad year also…she got kidnapped by the Symbionese Liberation Army.I don’t remember some of the music from this year…was a little busy…but I sure love the ones I do remember…and think my favorite song of the year was ‘Midnight at the Oasis’ by Maria Muldaur.But there was ‘Counting out Time’ by Genesis, ‘Summer Breeze’by Isley Brothers, ‘Seasons of the Sun’by Terry Jacks,’Bungle in the Jungle’ by Jethro Tull,and Elton John had a great year with’Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me, The Bitch is Back, and Benny and the Jets.’A great dance song…’the Bump’ by Kenny(didn’t they kill him on South Park????)’Jungle Boogie’ by Kool and the Gang.’Sweet home Alababma’by Lynyard Skynyrd.’Long Legged Woman Dressed in Black,’ by Mungo Jerry.
My oldest son David loved Olivia Newton-John’s ‘I honestly Love You.’ ‘Killer Queen’by Queen, ‘Money’ by Pink Floyd,and a couple of hits by the Stones,’Ain’t To Proud to Beg and It’s Only Rock and Roll.”Ricky Don’t Lose That Number’by Steely Dan, ‘Another Saturday Night’ by Cat Stevens and a Barry White song that is still one of my favorites’You’re the First the Last My Everything.’Plus a song that still makes my ass red…’You’re Having My Baby’by Paul Anka.ABBA had a bunch of hits,’Walter Leo, Honey, Honey and Ring Ring.”How Long’by Ace, ‘Midnight Rider’ by Greg Allman and ‘Jesica’by Allman Brothers Band.’James Dean’ by the Eagles, ‘the Joker’by Steve Miller Band, ‘Clap for the Wolfman’by Guess Who and’Tin Man’ by America.’Taking Care of Business and You Ain’t Seen Nothing yet’ by Bachman Turner Overdrive.’Can’t Get Enough’ by Bad company. David Bowie had a string of hits also, ‘Diamond Dogs, Rebel, Rebel, and Rock and Roll Suicide.’
‘Ride ’em Cowboy’by Paul Davis.Paul McCartney had hits with’Band on the Run and Get Junior’s Farm’ ‘Smoking in the Boys Room’by Provensville Station, and ‘I Shot the Sheriff’ by Eric Clapton.’Kung Fu Fighting’by Carl Douglas.’The Loco-motion’ by Grand Funk Railroad, ‘Roxette’ by Dr. Feelgood and ‘Kissing in the Back Row of the Movies’by the Drifters. ohhhh, and ‘the Piano Man’by Billy Joel.
‘Don’t Rock the Boat’by the Hues Corporation, ‘Ma-ma-ma-Belle’by Electric Light Orchestra,’Cat’s in the Cradle’ Harry Chapman, ‘Best of my Love’ by the Eagles,’Billy Don’t Be a Hero’by Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods.Last but not least a song I have taken to my heart for these past years….’Haven’t Got Time for the Pain’ by Carly Simon…
Iam not sure how, or sometimes even why…..but I made it through it…all of it…some not spoken..as I don’t want to make Jack out to be all bad…he was a sad man, who had many faults but he was a good son, brother and friend. He tried to be as good a father,son,and husband as he could….
I’m not posting any pictures besides the two up top…just kinda want to get this posted and out of me…


25 Responses to “1974..BRACE YOURSELF…”

  1. maritzia Says:

    Jackiesue, I just wanted to cry reading that post.

    I know what it’s like not wanting to demonize someone who hurt you. It’s hard, sometimes, when you’ve been so hurt and so traumatized, to see the pain and hurt in the person them as well. It’s something I’ve worked really hard on with my husband. We both grew up in abusive households (although mine doesn’t hold a candle to his), and it’s hard to come to the point not just of understanding their pain, but forgiving them for passing it on to you.

    I know you think you’re not special, but you are. You’ve looked through the pain others have caused you to the pain they were in, and that isn’t an easy thing. It takes great wisdom. I hope you take great pride in the woman that you are!

  2. Ben Says:


    That’s a mighty brave story. Both defending yourself (and more importantly, the child, which has inspired me to do some pretty courageous things), and telling the world say a lot about your character.

  3. cyberoutlaw Says:

    How awful it must have been to live through that part of your life. And how great it must feel to know that you’ve survived and moved on to a better one. You must be one incredibly strong individual.

  4. john Says:

    what a tremendous story . i’m glad it has a happy ending . only someone strong can survive something like what you went through.

    and yes , you are right . you are pretty. i thought i was looking at charlize theron .


  5. Autumn Says:

    You truly amaze me. I can see why you are a child of the Goddess. You are special, you are loved, and you are most of all admired and loved. I know I have never met you but I am so proud of you. You have pulled yourself up by your boot stings and are stronger for what you have been through. I think you are one hell of a woman!

  6. Nit Wit Says:


  7. Debbie Says:

    You’ve got more balls than most men I have ever met. We do what we must to survive Jackie Sue… I’m amazed, astounded and applaud you.

    However, I do know had that been me in your shoes, protecting my child… I wouldn’t have backed down either.

    Wow…. I can’t even find words. Which is rare.

  8. Debbie Says:

    Oh, and I couldn’t miss a chance to crack on the 1970’s style clothes…. Can you say curtain? 🙂 I love it… hot mama..

  9. buddha_girl Says:

    I’ll say much more in an email…for now, I hope my earlier comments about admiring you have solidified in your head.

    You are a brave, old soul who should always hold her head high. More people should have the strength and committment to life you show.

    Much love,

  10. Mama Kelly Says:

    oh jackie sue

    I dont know what to say

    I am so so so sorry that you (and your children) had to endure all of that

    but I am so glad that you survived it

    keeping you in my thoughts as Im sure posting all of this is by no means easy

  11. Jezebelle Says:

    I have so much in my mind but can’t put it into words. You are one hell of a amazing woman. The Goddess does not give you nothing you can not handle. And apparently she trusts you a whole hell of a lot!;)

    BTW~I assumed your daughter was you since she was a redhead:)

  12. Joshua Says:

    The more I learn about you, the more impressed I am by your strength and your courage. As they say in the military, you’ve earned your stripes, JS.

  13. texlahoma Says:

    I’m kinda proud of you JS, You did what you had to do, some people wouldn’t be able to. PS (You were a little hottie in the pic 🙂

  14. Big Pissy Says:

    I don’t even know what to say…..

    I am amazed at the strength and courage that it took you to get through it all.

    ….and to come out of it…not bitter…still managing to say good things about this man.

    I truly admire you.

    and regardless of what you say~you are special!



  15. Junebugg Says:

    I’ve already said how much I admire you and I second the comments of everyone else. Man, You’ve walked through fire and came out that much stronger. No wonder you don’t take shit from anyone now!! The Goddess couldn’t have a better strong right arm than Jackie Sue

    PS. If it ever comes to chosing sides, I wanta be on your team 8-}

  16. PJ Says:

    All the warning signs were there to run like hell. Don’t get married again, OK?

  17. tina Says:

    Holy chit…It is hard to even imagine. So sorry you had to go through that. You were damn strong for going through that and stronger coming out on the other side…

    Writing about it even after so much time has passed can be therapeutic. Thank you for sharing — I do hope that you have all the great things life has to offer with you now. Brave woman. I’m speechless.


  18. apositivepessimist Says:

    Not much more I can say except ditto….dittto…ditto to what everybody else has said.

    Would have taken more guts to get through the aftermath of it all.

    The girl next door to me used to adore singing Livvie songs…shame I hated listening to them.

  19. Donna Says:

    WOW! All I can say is WOW! Girl, How you survived all this is beyond me…but it probably made you a lot better person for going through all this and still going on strong. I just have the total utmost respect for you!

  20. BriteYellowGun Says:

    You did what you had to do, plain and simple. But now that you have come over to the Brite Side, everything is just fine.

    Now…can we all go visit your friend in Hawaii?

  21. Anonymous Says:

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  22. JuBlu Says:

    What an incredible story, JS. How did you find the strength to live through it?

  23. Pixie Says:

    :0 Your life is like a lifetime movie!
    I cant even remember what I was doing 2 years ago nevermind 20

  24. Granny Says:

    I’ll tell you my story someday. I haven’t posted it and probably won’t.

    We do what we must don’t we.

  25. Carina Says:

    Wow. Talk about mama bear…what a life.

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