I WOULD RATHER EAT SPAM THAN GET SPAM

I’m not the only one that gets spam…everybody gets spam…spam,spam spam,spam..fucking spam…. Do we all get the same generic spam or is our spam just for us and us alone?..If that is the case…they don’t fucking know jackshit…or in this case Jackie’s shit.. Because according to my spam…I need a bigger dick and pills to make it work better..and If my new and bigger dick stays hard for longer than 4 hours I need to see a Dr….let me tell you folks..if I had a dick, and it stayed hard for 4 hours I would be running around showing it to everyone in the city of West…’Look at my dick…have you ever seen a dick so big and hard before in your life?.. don’t you wish you had my dick?now that’s a dick for you…”…I have always known that women do things bigger and better than men…and I would have the evidence right there in my hands to prove it..a bigger better dick..and it stays hard for 4 hours..beat that..er.. top that…uh…well, you know what I mean.Another reason why I know that the spammers don’t know me is they keep trying to fix me up with older Christian men.One was even for older black Christian men…First of all you moronic assholes..I’m a pagan…and second of all, if I’m going to be out there dating..I wouldn’t want some ole fart who voted republican and goes to Church..thanks but no thanks. Plus the Goddess has promised me first dibs at Antonio Banderas when he divorce’s ole what’s her face…
The spammers also think I need a new car,a new house,a boat and insurance for all of them…They also seem to think I need more education…and in the words of Pink Floyd..we don’t need no more edukashun…leave us kids alone…They want to send me to school to study real estate,fashion design,interior design,and criminal law…They want to give me free stuff too. Fabreeze freshners, House of Olay face cleansers(Junebugg says they are really good, and when I decided to try them out..they quit sending me the spam),lap tops, XBOXES,Ipods, DVD’s,movies,cell phones,magazine subscriptions,free meals at Denney’s, Red Lobster,Black Eyed Peas and Steak and Ale..Trips to Disneyland, and every resort in the U.S. E-Bay wants to give me free tips, and Pogo wants me to sign up to their special club that is only $5 a month, when I can play there for free.I get offered work of all sorts, typing,computer jobs, being a store shopper, and selling everything from houses to livestock…The most amazing thing they want from me…is my opinion…are these people fucking crazy..???? asking for my opinion…yeah, that will work real well for them.You want to know what I think..I think you should stop sending me all this fucking spam. Speaking of black Christian suitors, I did get a sweet email from a black Christian gentleman in Nirobi that is willing to cut me in on a great money making plan..all I have to do is give him my bank account number, I’ll let you know how that turns out..
I was sort of ok with all the different types of spam…then today I got one that made me a tad nervous…it’s for a burial plot, but just to show how little they know about ole Jackiesue…..it’s a plot for two…Who sees the irony in that one….
fuckme till spam comes out my ass….

p.s…fucking blogger won’t let me upload, down load or put pictures on my blog..fuck you guys..

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15 Responses to “I WOULD RATHER EAT SPAM THAN GET SPAM”

  1. Nit Wit Says:

    I have high speed cable by Adelphia that I got almost no spam. It has now been sold to Time Warner and I am suddenly getting spam again even though they haven”t offically taken over.
    That’s the 8th owner of my local cable in 12 years or so.
    I only seem to get the you won this so give us your info and we might give it to you. I also keep getting offered jobs by E-BAY. I suppose Time Warner will try to get me to use AOL again. There I got all the spam that made me think the saw me as a limp little wiener who lived for Victoria’s Secret underwear.
    Kinda miss the Victoria’s Secret adds though. 🙂

  2. Nit Wit Says:

    I can see it. Jackiesue swaggers up to the counter in the hardware store, wips it out and asks to see Gary. 🙂
    I think that was his name.)

  3. cyberoutlaw Says:

    Oh yes, we’re all getting the same spam all right. Somewhere out there is an ambitious spammer who thinks everyone is a bald headed fat bastard who can’t get it up. And even if that were true, who in their right mind would actually buy genuine cures for baldness, lose weight overnight pills, and monster woody enhancements from some dude who doesn’t even have a real email address?

  4. Big Pissy Says:

    yep! Same spam as you….

    annoying!!!

  5. leo myshkin Says:

    there must be a lot of dumb bells out there for spammers to make money with that shit they send out.

    i fell off the turnip a few days ago but
    still haven’t fallen for any spam.

  6. Junebugg Says:

    {{{{{{Blush}}}}}}}
    Jackie Sue mentioned me in a post. BY NAME!!!! Does this mean that I’m famous or imfamous?

    Jackie, if you get a dick, you gotta name it. All men name their dicks. My ex called his “Oscar”. He claimed it was because it was a weiner, but I swear it was because he was full of bologna.

  7. Jane Says:

    I just got spam today with the title of “impress your friends with a degree”. WTF?
    At least it was different than the usual penis enhancement spam…

  8. Galt-In-Da-Box Says:

    *ROFPMPLMAO*
    I hate spam too.
    Why haven’t they come up wit designer dope for the ladies to increase vaginal sensitivity, etc?
    Why don’t they pimp that instead?
    You could make a king’s ransom in stand up comedy with this stuff!
    I come here for the laughs and the insights & you’ve never let me down! You’d think if they wanted your opinion, they’d just drop by.

  9. PJ Says:

    Spam in a can
    Spam in a man
    Spam in email
    Span by the tail.

    Dumb, huh?

  10. Tina Says:

    LMAO! Spam about Viagra, Cialis and penis enhancements, dude I even see that lame commercial on the tv…u seen it? The guy is jumping into the pool with a big dumbass smile on his face. And what makes me laugh the most is the fact that they say…If you sustain a hard-on for more than 24 hrs, see a doctor….WTF I find that quite interesting and funny, I dunno

    lol

  11. Tina Says:

    On a side note….speaking of SPAM…the kind that ya eat….well I tried to give a can of it to a bum years ago….he wouldn’t take it

    that’s pretty bad lol

  12. Autumn Says:

    Yep spam is a bitch..That is why I have a yahoo account for my email (the junk goes there..except for your jokes ..those are cute and I send them out to other friends). I have wordpress for my blog cause it lets me load photos everytime.

    P.S.
    Have you heard from Nancy? I’m worried about her…she hasn’t blogged in a few days.

  13. Debbie Says:

    You have a great site, please visit my site for some great insurance prices. We are better than Geico and Allstate… If you click here NOW, you will get an extra special rate on used auto loans… HURRY NOW, DON’T DELAY!

  14. JuBlue Says:

    I hate that spam offering me bigger male parts. I don’t want male parts on my body, big or small, thank you so much.

  15. Granny Says:

    Spam is why I use that horrid word verification thing with the letters no on can read or hear.

    It doesn’t help with email but it keeps it out of the comment box (see above)–>

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